This was a much better week- until I found out that my fellow clinician in the classroom with me has turned in her resignation. She is going to work for another agency and I am happy for her. On the other hand, I was turned into an anxiety ridden panic attack.
This ultimately means, for me, that I will once again be stuck in the classroom by myself. With hormone ridden, violent teenagers who might kill me. OK I may be exaggerating but you get the picture. I am freaking out.
I am still at the point where I do not think day treatment is for me. I am just not good at being a disciplinarian and you have to be with these kids. I don't even like calling their parents when they have had a bad day because I feel like I am tattling. Yes I know I am a push over!
There may be an opportunity for me to get another job and I need prayers for this one. I really am interested in the position and now that my other clinician is gone I am desperate for it. It is not like me to bail on a job after only a few months of being employed (Hey I made it through two years of DSS work!) but where I am now just doesn't seem to fit me.
Basically, I need tons of prayers- mainly for my sanity but also for my future. I have also started studying for my big test in October so lump in prayers for that beast of an exam also! I just want my clinical abilities to have a chance to develop- and it just isn't happening right now in the way I want it to.