Wedding dress alterations

Slowly but surely the wedding day is creeping up on me. This month brings along dress alterations. For some reason God decided to bless me (I'm sorry curse me) with, as I call them, the never ending growing boobs. I swear there is a gland issue going on! Due to the never ending growing boobs the process of finding a wedding dress scared the crap out of me. I did, however, find one and I was assured the dress would be fine after alterations.

Although, as stated previously, I am not a very good feminine example I went all out with this dress. I never went to prom or anywhere that needed such a nice dress so I figured now is the time to do it.

This is my dress:

Ahh I dreamed, I will look like a princess in my huge ballgown dress. Everything will be just lovely. 

This week I took my mother in law to the shop with me for alterations. Of course my dreams did not come true. Several things did not go so well:

1. The alteration area only has a small curtain to change behind. I am not exactly the "comfortable with my body" person. So starts my immediate worry that surely someone will walk in when I am changing my bra.

2. When changing said bra I proceed to pull a muscle trying to shove myself into it and the tulle slip.

3. Ask mother in law to help me get my dress on and- low and behold- the dress won't zip. I mean at all. I mean zips to my waist then gapping hole of openess around my chest. As in Meredith is now having a panic attack because her dress does not zip two months before the wedding.

Thankfully the ladies in the shop assure me that dresses are let out all the time and no one will ever know this happened. And the heavens opened and angels sang songs of relief.

Now back to eating cake...